A Message to Brighten Tomorrow / Written by Masami Saionji
What is the hardest thing for humans to do?
I believe it is apologizing.
Though it may be easy to say the words, putting them into action is extremely difficult.
Why can't we apologize sincerely?
Why can't we acknowledge our own mistakes?
It's because of our ego.
I am someone who loves to apologize.
Even to my own children, if I feel I am in the wrong, I apologize sincerely.
More so, if I feel I have wronged my mother, friends, or those around me, I apologize immediately. Moreover, I apologize from the bottom of my heart, reflecting on my shortcomings.
When I apologize, the other person forgives me sincerely and responds with words of compassion and love.
This initial act of apology leads to greater harmony and trust, creating a wonderful and large circle that moves forward together.
However, most people, whether in parent-child relationships, in-laws, siblings, or friendships, cannot apologize sincerely.
There is a strange fixed notion that apologizing means crushing one's ego, admitting defeat, and further highlighting one's mistakes, making it difficult to apologize to others.
Especially, it is rare for a wife to apologize to her husband, or a husband to his wife.
Even after a quarrel, neither side apologizes, and the tension lingers until things return to normal.
In my case, even if I know the other person is 100% at fault, I apologize first.
I want to get out of the unpleasant, discordant state as soon as possible and start anew.
Dragging it out for an hour, two hours, or even a day is a waste of life energy, I truly believe.
I have a conviction to resolve things immediately and start fresh with a new mindset, so I hate dragging out unpleasant situations.
But isn't it wrong to apologize when the other person is at fault?
Isn't that pandering to them?
Isn't that flattering them or adding to their burdens?
There are various opinions, but I don't think so.
On the contrary, I believe it gives the other person a chance to open their heart sincerely without stubbornness.
Moreover, dragging out an issue wastes life energy.
Therefore, if you want to resolve the issue quickly and use your life energy in a positive direction, you should apologize sincerely first, allowing the other person to restart with joy without creating new negative bonds.
If those who know the truth can bring joy to others through apologizing, isn't that enough?
And when you apologize, wishing for the fulfillment of the other's destiny, hoping they awaken to the truth as soon as possible, is not a defeat, nor pandering, nor elevating the other person.
It is a moment where both parties, through quarrels and mistakes, let go of negative emotions and strive to improve.
It's okay if feelings of hatred, jealousy, dissatisfaction, or various negative thoughts emerge.
What matters is what happens after those feelings come out.
At that moment, apologize sincerely. Apologize from the heart.
If you are in the wrong, you must apologize even more. If you do not apologize, it will not be good for your life.
If you apologize, you can start anew, filled with joy and hope.
Everyone, please try pushing yourselves to apologize sincerely.
You may find it easier than you thought.